Self Excersize 1

I’ve heard that I’m too nice (or is it complacent?). I’ve come to learn that there is a fine, hazy line between “oh-so-nice” and “I allow people to walk all over me, treat me like shit, and talk down to me, because I MUST deserve it, right?” In the past, I would go to the utter limit of my abilities for someone for a semblance of appreciation, and I’ve come to realize, “Wow. They treat me like a piece of crap. Why don’t I take care of myself like I take care of other people?” So I began to detach myself emotionally from people who tried to take advantage of me. When someone would say to me something I did not like, I would become disappointed, angry, and upset. My happiness and actions began to depend on them. By reframing my attitude, I realized that when I valued other peoples’ opinions more than I valued my own thoughts and estimations of myself, I allowed them to influence my happiness. Through reframing my outlook, I now listen to what they say, but as if they are saying it about someone else. If they are right, I can benefit from what they say. If they are wrong, I go on with my life as if nothing happened. I’ve come to establish emotional boundaries in order for me to live a sane life with my own sense of autonomy. I now back away from the uncontrollable and unchangeable. I’ve accepted that there is only one thing I can change in life and that is me; all other things are unchangeable. I reframe my expectations and think that things will be better than what they really are. Essentially, because of my emotional detachment from many elements in my life, I am more easily able to reframe my thoughts without so much “interference.”